Graduation feels like been years ago and I have to go back to work. No need to wait for the official letter from Bappenas or university which stating that I officially have finished my study. And so these conversations about the future are following me all around! Well, it’s been something (sesuatu banget hehehe) since I was still in Rotterdam 🙂 My friends and I sometimes talked about how it’s gonna be when we come back to our offices and for those who are married, the conversation was about back to the family and devoting their time for family and children.
On my graduation night I had a chit chat with a friend who asked me what I would do after the graduation. I told him frankly part of my future plan and I asked him back what is his plan. “Just go with the flow” more or less that was his answer. Though for me it was a less solid future plan, still it is a plan. And then when my friends and I were waiting for our connecting flights in Soekarno-Hatta, I had another chit chat about future plan. My friend, he shared me about his future plan with his wife and kids. And that is a good one, I pray for them 🙂 Also when I am home, future talk between parents-daughter. What do you expect them to say ? 😉 and then on my first day back to the office! One of my employers asked me my age and he counted how many time I would get promotion before I’m retired while the other employer told me that they prefer to have me back working for our office to let me go working for another office (owkay! back to the business, miss auditor!). In addittion, I also had another future talked with one of my colleagues, asking him another time extension before I’m ready back to work 😀 Well, hell yeah I need it ! My uniform does not fit me anymore, my house need to be renovated, that’s explain :-p
Somehow, everyone has a different level of passionate in planning his future and there is no exception for those who took years in studying what is a good planning and what is SMART goal. Perhaps dealing with planning theory for years have made us fed up with planning stuffs hahaha 😀 Still, there are people who come with a detail future plan, with actions to reach their goals and back up plan if one failed. Plan for the best prepare for the worst, they say. Yet, there are people who are owh-future-what- so-ever if you asked them their future plan. Just like another friend o’mine, she said she’s not going to make any detail future plan for herself because she likes surprises. As for me, I like surprises but I hate the bad ones, especially when it lessen your capitals in the future; human, natural, physical, financial and social capital. Oh stop, me ! coz I am starting mumbling about my thesis theory haha 😀
Still, it’s an option, decision, to plan or not to plan your future and it’s at your own risks. I mean, for me, future is a big deal. Simply because I think (again! It’s my thought) my future is not merely my future but I ‘ll share it with my future family, my future children (heyy I’m planning to have many kids hehe). Future means my responsibility for people to whom I will share my life. Having back this future conversation, I have to look back to the years when I was seriously starting to set up my future plan. It was not that I did not have any plan for my future before it, I did had but it was merely an imagination about my future. Simply called it a dream 😀
It was after my graduation (another graduation long time ago) I started planning my future. I noted down in a piece of paper things I want to achieve. As I previously said, I like surprises too. Therefore I do not have time frame or priority of which things to be achieved before others. Well, it’s not precisely like that 😀 I noted down my goals not in order just randomly. As for me, I do push myself to the limit but I do not limit myself that A has to be the first and C shall be achieved after B. Who am I to decide my future? I plan it, do my best to achieve it but the Almighty hold the highest power to decide. What will come first, let it be His surprises for me 🙂 But I’m not going to waste my time waiting for something that seems so far away without planning and pursuing anything else.
Call me naïve and stubborn (where have you been ? the universe has admit it long time ago :-p) for I stand for what I believe. I argued with my parents and my uncle when I was about to sign a mortgage. They said I have to wait untill I’m married to have my own house. The reason was typically a conventional view about a woman in a marriage. Again, when I applied for scholarship, I had to argue with the whole family for the same typically reason. It was not that they did not support my plans and it’s not that I did not understand their view, but really! Both of things are part of my future plan. Why shall I let time pass by, chances gone and do nothing just waiting ? I’m not waity deary J Besides, who knows what the Almighty wrote in my destiny? Isn’t that He will not change our faith unless we struggle for that ? Forgive my shallow understanding about this, but I plan what I want and do my best to achieve it and let God do the rest. Cliché isn’t it ? but again I’m trying to plan my future.
Another friend o’mine said life is not what you want, dear! That is oh so true! But that is also oh so wrong 🙂 Sometimes we have to adjust our plan, make change here and there, and compromise. And if you, anyone, come out of nowhere to my life with your proposal which will change my future plan. Really, I shall tell you that you have to make it worth it, convince me and prove me that you’re gonna make it work or I will simply walk away! Because I will pity myself if I ruin my future plan nor that I had to change it, adjusted it with yours and then we came out with nothing! Right now I am happy with my achievements and my own future plan. It is not that I am that arrogant or that selfish to not let anyone to have right to be a part of my universe. No, it’s not like that. I would like to share it with the one whom I destined to be with. From personal planning to community planning hehehe 😀 But really, it has to be equal. I don’t mind adjusting mine and I don’t mind accepting others. Yet, there shall be a good reason for that. I bet anyone who plans their future would understand me 🙂
PS: Just a note when I can see things clearly and tired of turning off my phone 🙂